We all have one. At least.
I’ve read my fair share of romance novels. Probably more than my fair share if l think about it. They have a recipe. Beautiful, but struggling girl,meets beautiful and successful man. They are attracted but fight it. Externals come into play, they break up. They get together again and they all live happily ever after.
Well. It’s a story. No need for it to be realistic. Although, that’s what grated my nuts when l read the lone Grey novel. It was like a Betty Heels heroine met a Penny Jordan hero. They are two M & B writers. Guess which one l enjoyed most? Nope, not ms Neels! Probably just me, but when l read a romance, l like to imagine myself in the character’s place. And with the grey situation,l could not.
Lately I’ve come across love stories that are closer to life, grittier than your Barbara Cartlands, closer to actual life, making them just a tad more believable and me more inclined to believe that l could, once again, have my own love story.
Alas. As the heroines became more real, the heroes did not. The men are still idealised versions. Even though they have issues, they are prepared to work on those issues since they want to win the woman’s heart. They do not let those issues rule them right out of a decent life. And so far I’ve not come across a male that was prepared to do that.
Then again, the longer you’re alone, the more precious your solitude becomes to you. In my case, if l had to spend every weekend visiting a boyfriend, nothing would ever get done around here! The few months no spent with C made that clear. So, a compromise have t be entered into. But they never get to the point where a compromise could be formed. Because, instead of looking at it realistically and realising we’re separate people with separate lives, we believe in the stylised version as depicted in books and movies. And choose to want the perfection they offer instead of the reality in front of them.
Nobody wants to read about laundry being done or leaking toilets that has to be fixed with money that you don’t have, so nobody writes about it. But the reality is, those things are a very real part of real people’s lives and, as such,must be take into account. I can’t see myself spending ever waking moment with somebody without worrying about the things that has to be done while I’m off gallivanting all over the place. But l also know you want to. You want to immerse yourself in the love affaire. You don’t want to be left out in the cold, alone and lonely when you have a perfectly good person to alleviate the loneliness and emptiness.
And that,my dear people, is why humans should fall in love while they’re still young, still unencumbered with all the above mentioned things. Before they become selfish with their time and personal space. While they still have the green wood that can bend rather than hardwood that breaks. While hope is still a thing with wings and the world is just waiting for you to change it.
The older you get, the more set in your ways you get. The more time you spend on your own, the more difficult it becomes to allow another into that space you’ve created and the more exasperating it gets because you want to, but you don’t know how.
NaNoWriMo is around the corner again. And l still have a love story that l want to write into being. A love story that l can believe in. One that l can, hopefully, one day make real. Suppose it’s easier,wading through the emotional pitfalls in the pages of a book rather than in real life!
KT Tunstall – Hold On: http://youtu.be/vsCi5cdm2tw