…my grandmother wore her wedding ring.
Only took it off after she died. My aunt gave it to me, as my grans’ namesake.
For five years I’ve cherished memories in the form of a valentine’s chain. A beautifully wrought bracelet. The pearls I bought myself because I’ve always wanted a string of pearls. The Donna Mia bracelet I filled with charms that meant something to me. The chain I got with some or other pink stone – because I always live in hope that love will one day find it’s way to me again. The blue topaz sterling silver ring I bought in Thailand.
Want to know what happened to those things?
Well, last night Africa and it’s inhabitants, struck. Now, some person
bastard, cunt, motherfucking AF, is walking around with things I spent my whole life collecting.
They stole all my jewelery. They stole all my perfume. They ripped open drawers. They threw stuff over the floor. They destroyed the sanctuary I fought so hard to surround myself with.
Now I have two females supposedly doing fingerprinting. It’s not going to well. Would look as if they don’t have all that much expertise in these matters, but I’m letting them be.
Am I angry? Not really. I’m sad. And I feel completely hopeless. I wish they had done this where I could have had a fighting change of protecting my hard-won possessions. To let me see the face of my enemy. Not so. they choose to bite at my ankles like a rabid dog. They choose to slink on the sidelines like hyenas. Because, even now, I’m NOT scared of them. Rape me – I have the holes for that. My body is stronger than you think, I can heal. I will do damage to you if you face me head on. And that’s why they never will. Because, in essence, they are yellow-bellied cowards.
Monetary value, probably around 25 k. History, memories – completely priceless. Loss of income, such as it is, R250 for the day – whoop de fucking doo. Replacing the security door – at least R300.
Mom came immediately. My son came. The youngest was on the phone the whole time. My sister came. The police came after I got highly upset at their seeming inability to act.
The biggest surprise? Mr P. He came here. Braved my family. Stood by me, spent the night with me. This morning he helped get the damaged security door off, and he’s helping me to replace my door lock. He’s been an actual stalwart when I needed him the most. He was even upset for me that my BiL did not even bother to make an appearance. Can you see why I’ve been hanging on to him? He’s a person of worth, regardless of the fact that he is in the same boat as me. Because a person’s worth is not in how much he owns or how much he earns. It’s in how he reacts when he has to deal with life’s bumps. How able and willing he is to help somebody in dire straits. As he did me last night and is still helping.
I’ve been too horrified to walk into my bedroom alone. He was there when I had to do it. My son packed the things away for me so I could walk around my bed.
G-d has put me on a road. I have to follow through with this road, even though I’m scared to death of all the familiar things I will have to leave. I really do think that He’s telling me that living in the city is not something that’s going to be my saving grace. He wants me to leave. He wants me to find my soul in a place far from the madding crowd. And I’m inclined to believe Him.
This is yet another step in my journey to my own salvation. I will prevail. I will make it. Not because it’s going to be easy.
Because it’s what I have to do. I will thumb my nose at these people. I will prove to them that they will not get me down. I am an Afrikaner. I am a Boer. I am the reason this country still has a semblance of order. Me and my people built this place. We kept it going. We’re a hard bunch to break. A difficult people to hold under. I will prevail. And I will be able to hold my head high – because I’m not a criminal. I’m not rubbish. And YOU, Mr criminal have taken stuff from me. You have taken cherished keepsakes from me. You have taken the sanctuary of my house away from me. But you can never have my soul – and with that, I am still who I am. And you will always only ever be a destroyer of peace. And what you would do well to remember. The energy you spread around you is the energy you will have with you all your life. And it WILL be returned to you tenfold.
AND I WILL STILL PREVAIL.
So SCREW you!!!