My Old Man is no more. I could not stand by while he went. I was not strong enough for that.
The vet took good care of him. Very sympathetic, understanding. did not think me weak for crying as much as I did.
I’m still crying.
He got into the car, no problem. Had his last sniff. Even got a few last compliments because, even while old, he was still a handsome gent. And a gentleman to the end.
Such a dignified guy was my Sash.
I have to thank you guys for the support I’ve been getting through this whole thing. It has made the world of difference.
Poor Cujo is sitting outside, quite forlornly. His tormentor is not there anymore. All that’s left if his collar and his bowl.
My back is just getting worse – I even slept with the corset last night, and have gone to get some really serious pain meds. I did indeed not go dancing last night. Spent the evening in a warm bath – only thing that seems to somewhat help with the pain.
All this will pass. All I will have left will be memories. And I sometimes wish I could even remove that from my brain. Will make things so much easier if I could just live in oblivion.
Alas, I can not. I have to live with all these things. I will remember them when I’m at my lowest. They will bring me down when I’m at my highest.
One has to wonder why. Why go through all this? Every time? Putting yourself on the line. Sure, there are good things. Unfortunately, in situations like this, you never seem to remember the good things. Just the pain and he heart ache. the never ending messy emotions.
On days like today, I wish I had somebody that could just be there for me. Hold me close. Say it will be all right. Even if it is a lie.