Some stuff.


Last night I watched 2 movies on the recommendation of a chick at work. She brought them to me because of the discussion we had on being single and having something wrong with you.

Tyler Perry movies – Diary of a mad black woman & Medea’s family reunion.

I did not even know Tyler Perry existed. But the movies were cool. Straightforward love stories, with the people not perfect in any way, normal people for the most part, even though they are still relatively young. Beautiful young black men, old-fashioned values and morals. Feel good movies.

In the one the guy days “Some men come to restore” Yeah right.

Only in the movies dude.

In real life they are out for everything they can get, and then some.

Reason I say this is, while I was watching the movie, I got an unexpected sms from one of my old bosses. I messaged him in 2012 after I heard that I would be retrenched, hoping he could maybe help me with a job of some kind somewhere. He never answered, and I left it at that. Last night he decides to sms me. Not because he wanted to apologise for not replying to my sms a year ago, but to bloody proposition me. Because he always thought I had a naughty sex appeal, found me attractive and pretty.

Just absolutely FML!!!

Even the ex said the other day, maybe it’s the way I talk that makes the stupid fools think I’m available. Now I ask you!!! Why do you think I avoid speaking to people? Every single thing I say is always misconstrued, turned around, fiddled with, when I’m only being stark staring honest. I never talk between the lines. What I mean is what I say. How on earth does one change one’s manner of talking? Of conversing to people? I don’t think one does. so one just keeps quiet. And even that’s not good enough because then they have an issue with you being stand offish and shit. People, just leave me the hell alone! I don’t bother you, I don’t affect your life adversely by being quiet. Just leave me be as I leave you be.

Yet another married man thinking I’m ripe for the picking up. Never giving me more than a cursory piece of his life, because of the way I speak and look.

What more must I do to stop them from getting the wrong message time and time again? I dress like a man. Wear no make-up. Don’t dye my hair. Swear like a sailor for the most part. Do things men traditionally do. Should they not start thinking I’m a bull dyke and leave me alone? Or treat me like one of the boys? What must I do? Cut my boobs off? Scar my face? Stink?

Lord only knows, I’ve given up with them.

And the fucking next one that tells me he’s not like all the others will have to really go out of his way to prove that this is actually true.

Show me how you’re not like any other male. Don’t tell me. Treat me like an actual person and not just something to empty your bags in, and we can talk again. Speak to me about any subject other than sex, and we can see your mettle. Look at me with any expression but lust in your eyes and we can maybe take it from there. Make me a part of your life, and we’ll see. Send me a good morning e mail, just because you want to, and not because you’re preparing the routine for emptying the bags once again. And please. Stop thinking that just because I support Triumph underwear(pun not quite intended), bleed once a month and produce estrogen, I am a lesser type of being. Stop thinking that I’m too stupid to realise your true motives. Stop treating me like a second class human. I am your superior in just about every way that counts – never forget that!!

I’m tired of this. Next time I say men are all the same, know that I’m not just generalising out of habit. I’m talking actual experience. Hard lessons learned. Many men spoken to. From all walks of life, all classes, all income groups, all involvement levels, all ages.

Then again, I have not spoken and interacted with every single man on this earth, so I might yet be wrong. Maybe who I am, attracts the kind of men I do. In which case, it might be best for me to just remove myself from society in its entirety. Live like a hermit, only interacting with people on the most superficial levels. I can manage on a very small stipend – I’m thinking that’s exactly what I should do. Find a job I can do from home with never seeing any actual person, and I can happily live my life away from everything in the world.

And now I have to see a kitchen about some food…

Enjoy your Sunday!


18 comments on “Some stuff.

    • Die ergste van alles H – hierdie is mense wat ek ken uit ander plekke as simpel dating sites.
      ek gaan soek beslis nie daarvoor nie!!
      Toemaar – ek los die hele spul nu uit – nie meer lus vir hierdie nonsens nie.

    • Don’t use my experiences as an excuse to not find somebody for yourself.
      I’ve been meeting only the rubbish, that’s not to say that there aren’t still some decent ones out there. We’re all just humans,and we all have our faults.
      I don’t WANT to be single anymore – been long enough.
      And if you ever one day want to have kids, you’re probably going to have to get a man from somewhere.
      But you should not be scared chickpea – getting hurt is really quite a big part of life – we won’t be who we are without it…

    • I’ve done my best to believe that Ric.
      I’m starting to doubt that I’m not the one in the wrong here – I mean, I’m the common denominator, not so?
      Maybe I’ve just been fishing in the wrong ponds – but that’s all done now. I’ll either meet somebody that normal way, or I’ll be on my own until the end of time πŸ˜‰

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