Stormy weather.


Yesterday I wished for more rain. Because I actually like a rainstorm. The thunder and lightning, the cleansing water…

I should have known not to tempt fate.

Seems that the Universe is really heaping up the trials. As if it’s not enough that I can’t bake anything until I either get the big stove fixed, or put the old, smaller one back in again, I now have to deal with roof leaks.

Have you any idea what a huge fright you get if water suddenly starts streaming down the wall? Out of the light fitting?

Not cool!!!

Do I know how to fix it? Nope, I do not.

Do I have the resources to pay somebody to come and fix it? Hell no!

Of course the ceiling in the scullery is completely screwed. Seems the water is leaking through the spot where the beams join. A broken tile right over the wall in the study. I’m scared to death of heights, so the chances of me getting on the roof is not enormous. Suppose I could climb up, but getting down is always a problem. Sure, I have insurance on my bond –

Do I get angry because I have nobody to help me? Do I blame somebody or something? Suppose the house is getting old, these things will happen, not much you can do about it.

I’ll deal with this too. Like I do everything else.

Might ask my biL to help me – could probably fix the tile with some kind of adhesive or something, put some plastic sheeting over the visible breaks – until I have the resources Β to fix it properly. Living in a shack in other words.

Can’t tell you how tired I am of this constant struggle.

And how unbearably tired I am of always doing every fucking thing on my own!!!! Dealing with everything by myself.

Where are all the useless men I know? Oh, they’re ready if there’s bedsport to be had, or even the remote possibility of it. But when it comes to something that might make an actual difference in my life, they’re notoriously absent. Think there’s a single one I could phone to come and help me? Oh, I could call them, but the excuses would be varied – I’ll not even bother. Not worth the effort.

I wonder if I’m being beaten to the ground so that I would learn to depend on people. Or that I should stop trying to control everything. Is this a necessary lesson though? Can’t I just live my life on the sidelines, on my own where I’m happiest? Why on earth do I HAVE to let people in? To screw me over even more than they already have? To use me and my kindness until they’re fixed only to then be like mist before the sun when I need help? I’ve asked for help before. It was not given. Now I don’t ask anymore. Not from people in any case. If I can fix it by myself, fine. If I can’t, it don’t get fixed.


The sun’s setting – have to do something to fix the stupid roof before it starts raining again and I have to swim around my effing house! Just as well I don’t have lots of carpets in here anymore.

Do have a spectacular day!!


10 comments on “Stormy weather.

  1. A little advice – no, no, bed talk is out as the old man speaks. Live it out tonight and tomorrow go to the bank and get them to send in their experts to do the work as you have bond insurance. Then sit back and enjoy getting some value back on the the interest you have paid. Been through that and it works. Have a great evening all for yourself.

    • I have insurance on the bond H. Payments have to be up to date before I can use it though. Unfortunately that’s not the case right at this point in time.
      I’ve gotten the kid to climb up there – luckily I had strips of tar that I used on the fishpond a while back – he patched up the biggest cracks – hopefully it keeps the water out until I can make a better plan.
      Hope your day has been a good one πŸ˜‰

  2. I know the feeling! Buckets in strategic spots all over the house. Risking life, limb, and aching muscles to replace all valleys. Redeployment of buckets in next rainstorm – i’m not sure whether the rain dripped most, or my tears! Back to the roof, and sealing of all joints. Most recent downpour, almost drip-free.
    Replacing one tile is dead easy, if one can get a spare. Or, one can buy sealing strips to put over the cracks rather like a plaster on a cut. Either way, about five minutes tops total time on the job. Pity I’m not within reach!

    • I think the strips I had here might just do the trick Col.
      Got the kid to climb up there, hopefully it will stop the next deluge from getting inside!
      Thanks for the knowledge – it will be used once I can get a spare tile from somewhere!

  3. Oh dear, that sounds really awful for you. We had a little leak a few days ago, but it’s easily fixable and luckily hubby isn’t afraid of heights. He’s a great roof-walker. πŸ™‚ I hope you take newsy’s advice and that it gets fixed soon and without any great expense.

    • I’m not afraid of much AD, but heights just completely disable me!! On a primal level, nothing I can do to stop or change it.
      Hopefully what i got the kid to do will help until I can get it seen to properly.

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